I have ton of goals. Income goals, weight loss goals, health goals, relationship goals, travel goals, social media goals, hair goals. Tons of goals. I had them last year and I have them this year.
But here’s the difference for me this year. Last year, the quest in meeting my goals became very burdensome at times. I was weighted down and became overwhelmed. Even though they were well thought out and great things happened, I still felt so… blah… in the pursuit of them. I couldn’t figure out why I felt so heavy in my heart. Then it clicked for me.
I wasn’t doing things that made me feel good. I was straight up “in my bag.” I was making good money, but it wasn’t exactly making my heart sing. I was definitely chasing the bag, but I wasn't chasing my happiness alongside it. I am the type of person that needs to feel passionate about the moves I’m making. Things work out best for me when I am intuitively connected and emotionally invested in my actions and projects. When I feel good about it, I work better in it. In order to really dive into my passion, I had to dive into me and what makes me feel best. So here are some things I know.
Making money is great, but positive impact matters most to me. I am a giver at heart, and I love to see underdogs win. I love to laugh and experience new things. I have bad anxiety when things stack up against me, if I don’t have an organized way of dealing with them over time. I am spontaneous but I don’t like to feel rushed. I love to help and my life’s mission is to help people be great in their own lanes of business. In order for me to be most effective, I recognize my need to feel good in all that I’m doing, or I will shut down.
So this year, as I set my goals, I’m evaluating the action steps I need to take in order to reach them, but also how I actually feel about those action steps. I’m setting self-care goals and putting mental/emotional checks and balances in my routine. I’m calling all of this my Feel Good Goals. Here are a few ways I’m planning to implement Operation Feel Good in 2020. I would encourage you to adopt these as well, if you haven’t already. Feel free to share what you would also add to this list.
1. I am making myself a priority. I will make sure that I have what I need. I spend a lot of time making sure that others are squared away. But when I find my own needs lacking, I will suffer through it. I have to make myself just as much of a priority as I make my clients, my family, my friends and anyone else who needs me. It’s the flaw of the giver; I’m sure many of you can relate. In 2020, we’re getting what we need, too! We’re also drinking our water, we’re exercising, we’re eating vegetables, and we’re spoiling ourselves with self-love practices, whatever that may look like for you!
2. I’m saying NO to MYSELF and YOU if I see opportunities that ONLY increase income and not my overall happiness. Everything that glitters ain’t gold. And even if it can put gold coins in my bank account, it could potentially deplete the gold I cherish most, which is my joy. Just because it adds dollars doesn’t mean it makes sense. And some opportunities I get presented with doing always add dollars, but they create long-lasting relationships and meaningful content, which I love. I’m evaluating new opportunities for their total impact on me, spiritually, physically, financially, mentally and emotionally. It has to pass the full 5-point self inspection before I’ll add it to my plate.
3. I’m saying YES to events that I think will make a positive impact in my life, in areas that I feel need growth and stimulation. This doesn’t just mean business events, but I’ll definitely be going to more of those, too. I will be going to events that add value to me in different ways. One of my Feel Good Goals include meeting new people that like to smile and love life. So, you’ll find me networking at feel good events, such as brunches, mingles, live music shindigs, ladies nights out, retreats, etc. If you’re having one, HIT MY LINE!
4. I will acknowledge when something is overwhelming me and seek the proper help. The things in my life (my family, my businesses, etc) require that I be present. So, I cannot completely shut down on them when I’m feeling overwhelmed. However, I’ve learned that trying to just “push through” the overwhelmed feeling doesn’t prove to be successful for me either. Instead, I’m giving myself permission to STOP, BREATHE AND ASK FOR HELP. I won’t isolate myself. I won’t let pride keep me from taking a break and reaching out. I won’t let responsibilities bombard me to the point where I cannot function. I will stop, breathe, assess what’s happening and determine what needs to happen for me to be okay and for things to still get done.
5. I will do more giving in my community. I used to carve out lots of time to put my hands to work for the less fortunate in my own community. This year, I’ll be getting back to that. I give away a scholarship every year, but that’s not enough for me. I need to get back to philanthropy in a bigger way. In what ways have you taken time to care for those who can’t do a darn thing for you in return?
6. I will have more fun that is not work-related. As a mom, wife and entrepreneur, it’s easy to forget to make a little time to just have fun. Nothing work-related. Just pure fun. Some folks I talk to can’t even tell you what they like to do just for fun anymore. I did some traveling last year, but most of it had a work plan attached to it. This year, I will be taking fun trips. Girls trips, family trips, solo trips. Day trips. Weekend trips. Week-long trips. Traveling makes my heart sing. What do you do in your “fun time?” If you don’t have a fun time activity, I would highly recommend exploring some new things, just to see if you like them!
7. I will be okay with deciding that something is not good for me, and not allow people to make me feel bad about it. Meaning, if I say no to you, it’s because it was the best decision for me, even if it’s not what you wanted. My choice is just that… my choice. No one is entitled to me, my time, my knowledge, my abilities, my friendship, my resources, nothing. Don’t feel obligated to do things just because of who is sending the request. You are free to say no, with or without explanation.
8. I will laugh and smile… a lot. Peace is the goal. Joy is the result. I’ll be doing so much more self investment in my joy.
What’s on your 2020 Feel Good Goals List?
Let’s make 2020 the best year of putting in work AND feeling good while we do it.